Family and friends are the most important resource that exists for domestic violence victims. Safe & Together offers specific concrete steps that family and friends can take to support a loved one who is being abused.
This page is our resource exclusively for people who are worried about a loved one experiencing abuse. Family and friends are often the first people to notice something is wrong, and the first people victims turn to for help. Unfortunately, despite loving and caring intentions, these conversations sometimes go awry. Learning your loved one is being abused can be scary. Your first instincts about how to respond may not be the right fit for her situation. Victims and their loved ones can walk away from these conversations feeling less than satisfied, and without any concrete progress toward safety.
Here are FREE resources specifically for family and friends – to assist them in being an ally to victims and survivors of domestic abuse:
- Family and Friends Ally Guide (Printable black & white version here)
- Coming Soon! Webinar: Keeping Children Safe by Partnering with Adult Survivors
- Documentation tool (coming soon!)
- Social media posts: Below are several image posts you can download and use on your own platform. Remember to tag us @SafeandTogether on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and Twitter. We also suggest using the hashtag #DomesticViolence #DomesticAbuse #DVAwareness. Finally, we suggest copy and pasting the link to the Ally Guide so your followers can have access to the Guide too: https://safeandtogetherinstitute.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/A4_AllyDoc_web.pdf
To support allies of survivors, here are some national-level support contacts. Most of the phone numbers are a mixture of 24-hour-a-day hotlines and business-hour helpline services. Many provide online chat services as well. The services provided by these agencies are generally free. All phone numbers are local to that country. Many of these agencies also offer support and referrals for male survivors of domestic violence.
(Australia) National sexual assault, domestic and family violence counselling service:
https://1800Respect.org.au Ph: 1800 737 732
(Australia) Lifeline: https://www.lifeline.org.au/ Ph: 13 11 14
(Australia) Men’s Line: https://mensline.org.au/ Ph: 1300 78 99 78
(Australia) Kids Helpline: https://kidshelpline.com.au/ Ph: 1800 55 1800
(Canada) Shelter Safe: https://www.sheltersafe.ca/
(provides a list of domestic abuse shelters in each province and territory with phone numbers)
(Hong Kong) Hong Kong Federation of Women’s Centres: https://womencentre.org.hk/ Ph: 2386 6255
(New Zealand) Women’s Refuge: https://womensrefuge.org.nz/ Ph: 0800 REFUGE or 0800 733 843
(New Zealand) It’s Not Ok Campaign: http://www.areyouok.org.nz/ Ph: 0800 456 450
(New Zealand) Lifeline: https://www.lifeline.org.nz/ Ph: 0800 543 354
(Northern Ireland) Northern Ireland Women’s Aid: https://www.womensaidni.org/ Ph: 0808 802 1414
(Scotland) Scottish Women’s Aid: https://womensaid.scot/ Ph: 0800 027 1234
(Singapore) Association of Women for Action and Research: https://www.aware.org.sg/ Ph: 1800 777 5555
(UK) National Domestic Abuse Helpline: https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/ Ph: 0808 2000 247
(UK) National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline: http://www.galop.org.uk/domesticabuse/
Ph: 0800 999 5428
(UK) Respect Men’s Advice Line: https://mensadviceline.org.uk/ Ph: 0808 8010327
(US) National Domestic Violence Hotline: https://thehotline.org Ph: 1-800-799-7233/1-800-787-3224 (TTY)
(US) StrongHearts Native Helpline: https://www.strongheartshelpline.org/ Ph: 1−844-762-8483
(US) The National Deaf Domestic Violence Hotline: https://thedeafhotline.org/
(Wales) Welsh Women’s Aid: https://www.welshwomensaid.org.uk/ Ph: 0808 80 10 800
Technology can help provide safe communication with your loved ones, or it can be a way for the person using violence to monitor and stalk your loved one’s communication and movements. This website, www.techsafety.org, sponsored by the US-based National Network to End Domestic Violence, is a resource about technology and abuse for allies and their loved ones, and how to safely use technology to communicate.