Undiscussible on TalkRadio: When Religious Traditions Are Manipulated to Abuse

Domestic abuse doesn’t always look like violence—and it doesn’t stop at the front door of faith, culture, or community.

In this powerful episode of Undiscussed, broadcaster and advocate Charlie Webster explores how religion and culture can be weaponized by perpetrators as part of coercive control, particularly during periods of isolation such as COVID-19 lockdowns.

At the heart of the episode is the lived experience of Abeera, a Muslim woman who shares how her husband used distorted interpretations of Islam to isolate, threaten, and psychologically abuse her during pregnancy and marriage. What unfolds is a clear picture of domestic abuse as a pattern of behavior over time—marked by fear, control, erosion of self-worth, and threats around children—rather than a single incident of physical harm.

Abeera’s story is contextualized by expert insight from AbdulWahid Stephenson, Islamic scholar and mediator, who makes clear that abuse is not rooted in religion, but in perpetrators’ choices. He challenges common misconceptions by explaining that Islamic teachings explicitly condemn coercion, degradation, and harm—and that faith is often misused by abusers to legitimize control and silence victims.

The conversation is further deepened by Ruth Stearns, from the Safe & Together Institute and a survivor of religious abuse, who situates Abeera’s experience within a broader understanding of coercive control and spiritual abuse. She highlights how invoking religious authority can intensify fear and entrapment, and why faith leaders and systems must be equipped to recognize and respond to abuse safely and responsibly.