Abusers’ Perceptions of the Effect of Their Intimate Partner Violence on Children

Emily Rothman, David Mandel, and Jay G. Silverman surveyed 464 partner-abusive fathers enrolled in batterer intervention programs across the U.S. and Canada to answer a question with real stakes for custody and risk decisions: do men who abuse their partners recognise the harm their violence causes their children? The study, published in Violence Against Women, found that biological fathers were significantly more likely than social (step)fathers to say their abuse had negatively affected their children—but that this awareness didn’t extend to their plans to change.

Biological fathers were 1.69 times more likely than social fathers to report that their abuse had negatively affected their partner’s ability to parent, and more likely to worry about the long-term effects of their violence on their children. Yet when researchers asked what fathers would actually do if they believed their abuse was harming their children, biological and social fathers reported the same intentions—no significant difference in whether they’d stop the violence, seek help, or change their living situation. The authors conclude that fathers’ stated concern for their children is a poor predictor of whether they intend to change their abusive behaviour.

The authors point to a direct implication for family courts: judges and custody evaluators should be cautious about weighing an abuser’s expressed remorse or concern for his children, since this study found no link between that concern and stated intentions to stop the abuse. They suggest unsupervised visitation or custody decisions should rest on demonstrated behaviour change over time rather than verbal expressions of regret.