For too long we have not listened to children and young people’s experience of their father’s violence. In their groundbreaking research, Professor Cathy Humphreys and Dr. Katie Lamb interviewed children and young people about what they wanted to say to fathers who were violent to their families.
This interview includes: one of the digital stories where a young person, in her own voice, shares her feelings about her father and his behavior. Katie and Cathy describing their interactions with the young people and what they learned from them.
David and Ruth explore with their guests how some professionals struggle with confronting fathers who choose violence with the lived experience of their children. It’s a discussion of how aboriginal workers used young people’s digital stories to help men change.
Website for digital storieshttps://violenceagainstwomenandchildren.com/?p=540
Journal article about key research findingsLamb, K., Humphreys, C .and Hegarty, K (2018), ‘ “Your behaviour has consequences”: Children and young people’s perspectives on reparation with their fathers after domestic violence’, Children and Youth Services Review, vol 88 p164-169
Journal article about ethical challenges which arose in the workLamb, K., Humphreys, C. and Hegarty, K (2020) “Research ethics in practice: challenges of using digital technology to embed the voices of children and young people within programs for fathers who use domestic violence”, Research Ethics, 1-17 (Full text available at https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1747016120936324Full Phdhttps://minerva-access.unimelb.edu.au/handle/11343/129319
More About The Podcast
You asked, we answered. Amidst our current, global political and social upheavals, during movements, activism and testimonies, during legal cases, fear and victim-blaming – we’ve heard your voice asking for clarity, insight and thoughts about how all of this is reflected in the Safe & Together Model. Many of the stories and news pieces we hear about from our partners all over the world involve complex questions, yet the beginnings of change and hope are based on the sound, simple principles of the Model.
To that end, in our new podcast, “Partnered with a Survivor,” S&T’s Executive Director and Founder, David Mandel and Ruth Stearns Mandel offer a raw and intimate glimpse into their personal and professional partnership and what it means to truly partner with a survivor, raise a family based on S&T principles and engage in social change at every level. This is a podcast for practitioners and parents, partners and employers, coworkers and friends – and anyone else who may want clarity, understanding, hope and healing.
What does it mean to give consistent consent? What is coercive control? How do you probably see it or feel it every day? This is a podcast you’ll wish you had heard when you were a teenager. In unsure, confusing times, it’s our goal to widen the audience for the Safe & Together Model-associated material to survivors, their family members, and even perpetrators. For professionals familiar with the Model, it will offer another angle on the issues addressed by the Model. For those who don’t know Safe & Together, it offers a connection to the themes and ideas behind the work.
These podcasts are a reflection of Ruth & David’s on-going conversations which are both intimate and professional and touch on complex topics like how systems fail victims and children, how victims experience those systems, and how children are impacted by those failures. Their discussions delve into how society views masculinity and violence, and how intersectionalities such as cultural beliefs, religious beliefs and unique vulnerabilities impact how we respond to abuse and violence. These far-ranging discussions offer an insider look into how we navigate the world as professionals, as parents and as partners. During these podcasts, David & Ruth challenge the notions which keep all us from moving forward collectively as systems, as cultures and as families into safety, nurturance and healing.
*Trigger Warning: Some of the topics discussed in the next 30 min are deeply personal and sensitive, which may be difficult for some people. We also use mature language to describe some feelings. Finally, we use gender pronouns like “he” when discussing perpetrators and “she” for victims for two reasons: 1.) statistically, more men are perpetrators than are women when it comes to domestic violence, abuse and coercive control; and 2. For clarity sake, sticking with one pronoun causes less confusion for the listener. We know there are many men who are in abusive relationships and we are not invalidating their situations.
About the podcasters: David and Ruth are committed to creating systems and cultures of nurturance and safety. David Mandel founded the Safe & Together Institute which trains systems in domestic violence aware practices from a child safety lens. Ruth Stearns Mandel is a survivor of complex abuse, child abuse and domestic abuse growing up in a cult. She is a former teacher and trainer using her experience to clarify messages and complexities around abuse and survivors.